Wednesday, November 03, 2010

MI Assistant AG Shirvell On His Own Cyber-Bullying Blog: "He acts like a gay Nazi." (Yes, he really said that.)

"How can you seek protection from crazy people?"
- Michigan Assistant Attorney General Andrew Shirvell during an interview on The Daily Show (Monday, November 1, 2010)

It's a very reasonable query. And, it's one which I'm sure most Americans can relate to.  And, it's one to which I would respond: "That's a very good question, Andrew.  How do you do that?

Especially when those crazy people...
A.) Run for public office?
B.) Receive enormous and untraceable campaign donations?
C.) And, scores of bamboozled people vote for them?"
(Sigh)  But, I digress...

It's what Mr. Shirvell said during an interview on Monday night's The Daily Show that very nearly caused me to rupture a blood vessel...

He was being interviewed by TDS correspondent Jason Jones on the very serious and timely topic of cyber-bullying.

During the interview, Mr. Jones read an excerpt from "The Parent's Guide To Cyber-Bullying" (As published by the State Of Michigan Attorney General's Office):

Mr. Jones: "Cyber-Bullying is defined as 'Technology used to harass or embarrass.'"

And, what was Mr. Shirvell's responses to that definition (a definition taken, verbatim, from the Parents' Guide, mind you)?

Mr. Shirvill's 1st Response: "No, that's too broad of a definition."
(To which Mr. Jones informs Mr. Shirvill, "That's the State's definition.")

Mr. Shirvill's Next Response: "That's not the State's definition."
(At which point which Mr. Jones informs Mr. Shirvill that he has The Parents' Guide (which he's been holding the whole time) and raises the papers in each hand.

After which Mr. Shirvill begins looking like he's becoming uncomfortable...
But, not being the type of person who would ever want to admit to having made any error of any size...
(What influential attorney or Assistant AG would?)  Mr. Shirvill goes on to declare:
"That (the definition given by Mr. Jones) was taken out of context."

(*Oh, before I forget to mention it: Mr. Shirvill is the Assistant Attorney General for the Great State of Michigan.)

Continuing in the same conversational tone, Mr. Jones points out that he's just reading the definition exactly as it's written in The Parents' Guide.

Now, the interview takes a completely unexpected turn and gets really interesting.
(It was just like watching a top-quality police drama... during one of those scenes where the lead detectives are interrogating a suspect... they not only know he's guilty - they also have all the evidence needed to convict him - regardless of whether he cooperates or not... that spectacular moment when the camera cuts to the suspect's face... and it hits him: He has nothing they want and he's going to prison.)

Mr. Shirvill's next two declarations spill out much faster than anything said said earlier. His voice rises, noticeably... and he begins shaking his head side-to-side - at an odd angle:

Mr. Shirvill: "I've done nothing immoral. And, I've done nothing illegal."
(How strange... Did anyone else hear an accusation being made?)

At this point, Mr. Jones holds up an image which had been posted on a blog of Mr. Shirvill's.
This particular blog, Chris Armstrong Watch, is one that Mr. Shirvill, himself, created with a single purpose in mind.

That purpose can be summed up in one brief definition: "Cyber-Bullying: Technology used to harass or embarrass."

Turns out, Mr. Shirvill has dedicated a great deal of his online time and effort to harassing and embarrassing Mr. Chris Armstrong, a student at the University of Michigan who had been elected to the position of  "Student Body President".

And, why would the 30yr. old (and one might assume, busy?) Mr. Shirvill use his valuable time to harass the University of Michigan's Student Body President, you might ask?

Another very reasonable query...

The Answer:
Because he's gay, of course!
(Well, duh!  According to Mr. Shirvill, being gay is "... diametrically-opposed to the natural order of things.")


The image Mr. Jones had presented was a Photoshop'd image of Mr. Armstrong... with the word "Resign" written in prominent black magic-marker across his face... along with the iconic and much-loved Rainbow Flag alongside his neck - here and now-defaced by Mr. Shirvill's personal superimposition of a large, black magic-marker Nazi swastika in a white circle at the flag's center and a black magic-marker arrow pointing from the flag to Mr. Armstrong's face.

When Mr. Jones questioned Mr. Shirvill on the morality of his creation (not a one-of, by any stretch of the imagination)... Mr. Shirvill deflected, "How is that immoral?"  Mr. Jones began to reply, "Well, you're likening him to a...". (Mr. Jones, thankfully, didn't have to finish the statement, Mr. Shirvill was more than happy to do it for him, triumphantly):

Mr. Shirvill: "He's acting like a gay Nazi... yes." (Said while simultaneously nodding his own head - in agreement with himself.)

"... A Gay Nazi?"
Oh, Really?
Are you 100% Positive of that, Mr. Shirvill??

Mr. Shirvill: Not only are you a shamelessly-hateful, intolerant bigot...
One with a bizarre obsession/fixation on one male college student - at that...
But, you are also an accomplished imbecile:

A Quick History Lesson - Just For You:
"The Nazi campaign against homosexuality targeted the more than one million German men who, the state asserted, carried a "degeneracy" that threatened the "disciplined masculinity" of Germany. Denounced as "antisocial parasites" and as "enemies of the state," more than 100,000 men were arrested under a broadly interpreted law against homosexuality. Approximately 50,000 men served prison terms as convicted homosexuals, while an unknown number were institutionalized in mental hospitals. Others—perhaps hundreds—were castrated under court order or coercion. Analyses of fragmentary records suggest that between 5,000 and 15,000 homosexual men were imprisoned in concentration camps, where many died from starvation, disease, exhaustion, beatings, and murder." (From: The United States Holocaust Memorial Museum)

"... gay Nazi."

You're a blithering idiot.

(Whew! O.K., Take a deep breath. Ahh. That's better.)

Here's the link to the episode and the (brief/funny/infuriating) interview (it's the 2nd segment of the show):
Enjoy! (I did, really.)
The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 11/01/10 (*For unknown reasons, the link goes to the 11/02 episode. Just scroll down and click on Monday night's. Thanks!)

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